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CBC/NHLPA Player Poll – The Exclusive Write-In Votes

Written on February 1, 2011 at 11:57, by HTTN

As part of the All-Star Weekend, CBC and the NHLPA conducted the annual player poll. HTTN did some research and found out that write-in votes were taken, but due to the inappropriateness of many, they weren’t released. Our research team did some digging, and we provide the most interesting answers below:

1. What team would you least like to play on?

The team with Mike Ricci.  He looks like a psychopath. I’d be scared to be in the same changeroom as him.

2. What rink has the worst ice?

I’m not about to insult Florida because we love our golf trips and the free wins that come with them.

3. What team would you most like to play on?

Whatever team Shane O’Brien’s on. That man knows how to party!

4. What rink has the best ice?

Chicoutimi. Hey, aren’t the Coyotes looking for a new home?

5. What is your favourite rink to play in?

ACC. Great crowds and a guaranteed win. Can’t beat that.

6. Which current assistant coach should be the next head coach?

How about which head coach should be the next assistant coach – Cory Clouston. In the minors.

7. Which coach demands the most of his players?

Well it ain’t Todd McClellan. Have you seen how much ice time Joe Thornton gets despite dogging it on every shift?

8. Which coach is the easiest to play for?

Rick Tocchet. He encourages players to throw games for… financial reasons.

9. Which coach would you most like to play for?

Gordon Bombay

10. Which coach would you least like to play for?

Have you read Theo Fleury’s Book? That dude… yikes.

11. Should the instigator rule be abolished?

Yes, and it should be replace with the Blades of Steel fighting rules: only the person who loses the fight gets a penalty.

12. Which Canadian city deserves an NHL franchise?

Quebec City. Have you seen the women? Talk about hospitality.

13. Should fighting be banished from the NHL?

Should Americans be banished from the NHL? Yes.

14. Which rink has the worst boards/glass?

No idea, but you know who’s annoying? Pierre McGuire.

15. Who is the toughest forward to play against?

Sidney Crosby. He bitches til your ears bleed.

16. Who is the best referee?

That guy who used to not wear a helmet and had wicked hair. He’s cool.

17. Which team is underrated?

Modo. Best team anthem.

18. Who is the toughest defenceman to play against?

Mike Green. I heard he joined a Vespa gang.

19. Which team is overrated?

The Maple Leafs, but they’re already at the bottom, so they should be demoted to the minors.

20. Which active player would you select to start a franchise?

Paul Bissonnette: ambassador for the game

21. Who is the cleanest player?

None. The showers in the changeroom are just for show. Most players only apply cologne.

22. Who is the most underrated player?

Underrated playa? Fifty Cent.

23. Which active player is the best role model?

Sean Avery: successful NHL player, entrepreneur (fashion company), gorgeous girlfriend, lives in the Big Apple… he just needs some integrity, humility, loyalty, and honesty and he’d be perfect!

24. For skaters only: Which goalie is the most difficult to score on?

Pascal Leclaire – let’s just say he’s pretty elusive.

25. For goalies only: Which player is the most difficult to stop?

Marek Malik – he’s 1-for-1

26. Who is the hardest to take the puck off of?

Pronger – can’t get any pucks from the “puck bandit”

27. Who is the smartest player?

Phil Kessel – by being picked last in the ASG draft, he managed to get a new car.  What a loser.

28. Who is the toughest player?

Kyle Wellwood. Those soft hands are like vice grips if you try to pry a chicken wing out of them.

29. Who is the best skater?

You ever seen how fast Matt Cooke skates away from confrontations?

30. Who is the league’s fastest skater?

Evgeni Nabokov: have you seen how quickly he gets back and forth between here and Russia?

31. Who has the hardest shot?

Well, Shane O’Brien takes the most shots and he prefers the hard ones.

-this post is a collaboration with @gregleeson & @_gardiner

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