Written on August 11, 2011 at 07:42, by headtothenet
Swaggerville. Sounds like a pretty cool place, doesn’t it? Too bad it’s from Winnipeg. You know, that little village that resides somewhere between B.C. and Ontario; the one that’s said to have mosquitos the size of helicopters – not that any of us have ever visited to verify their claim to fame.
Either way, now that their Blue Bombers have amassed a stellar 5-1 record, the team’s defense has anointed itself Swaggerville.
Let’s get this straight: we’re 6 games into an 18 game schedule, the Bombers had a record of 4-14 last season, they haven’t won a Grey Cup since 1990, and they’re walking around with a $1000 chip on their shoulder all of a sudden?
This week, the 5-1 team from Winnipeg comes to Vancouver to face the 1-5 B.C. Lions. The Lions’ 0-5 record prior to the past week’s win did not show that 4 of those losses were extremely close and that the team was not nearly as inept as a record like that would suggest. With the addition of receiver Arland Bruce, who plays his first game for his new team this week, the outcome is anything but preordained, despite the lopsided records.
So here’s the question: what happens if Swaggerville fails to stop the offense of the 1-5 B.C. Lions this week? This loss alone would force an abrubt name change, wouldn’t it? After all, I don’t know how much swagger a defense can have after handing a team only it’s 2nd win of the season.
In short, the main reason the Lions have to win this game is so that they have to burn all those silly T-shirts and Winnipeg can go back to being plain old Winnipeg, the town that Gary Bettman prayed he’d never have to visit again.
Oh, and speaking of unearned swagger…
First, how depressing is it that this is now a name and face that all sports fans know? Sadder still, is the fact that the poor man thinks it’s because he’s a great caddie.
Following Adam Scott’s win this past weekend, Williams said the following:
“I’m a very confident front-runner. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t a little nervous. Obviously, Adam was leading the tournament… I’m a great believer in myself.”
But of course he was nervous! After all, he had to calculate distances, carry a golf bag, and hand clubs to his sidekick Scott. Really, it’s incredible that he survived the ordeal and put on such an incredible peformance of caddie-ing dominance.
In fact, with 13 Majors to his name, Williams is one of the greatest caddies of all time!
…actually, I’m not sure anyone cares to keep stats for caddies so there’s no real way to verify this.
Perhaps Williams should step back for a second and realize that he’d be a nobody had not Tiger Woods, the greatest golfer of our generation, allowed him to stand by his side during those years of domination.
Williams’ blatant need for attention is nothing new. Most golf fans can remember the shot of him high fiving Woods in 2005 at the 16th hole at Augusta when he holed the chip.
The caddie made sure he was in the picture for any and every incredible Tiger moment. In the end, he got ditched, but instead of appreciating what he was given, he chose the bitter and vengeful route.
This weekend, The PGA Championship, golf’s final Major of the year takes place, and there will be far too much attention on Williams once again. And though it seems a long shot that Tiger will win, you can rest assured that if he does, he won’t have a single harsh word for his ex-caddie – he’ll take the high road.
That’s what makes Tiger who he is – he always does the right thing. Oh crap…
Okay, outside his love life.
Looks like a good weekend for sports fans, Vancouver, so make sure the couch is reserved and the nachos are ready. Oh yeah, and the Whitecaps are playing on Saturday as well. Come back for our preview of that match on Friday.